This vicious world may take everything away from you - your wealth, your loved ones, your pets etc. But your education and God is something that cannot be seized. Over the years, all your experience as a human, all your knowledge and wisdom is something that will follow till' you breathe your last breath.
An over-confident and hasty girl with a deranged mind made a very immature comment on a friend's blog - Education doesn't maketh a man, so what if you're smart?
I stand strong on my opinion that in this dog-eat-dog world, education is what counts. That harmless piece of paper could allow you to attain great heights, and be a somebody in the society. We are no longer living the days of the 50s-80s where you could hope that lady luck shines and you miraculously "made it big".
Now you could debate and retaliate by saying that in the entertainment and sports industry, education is not compulsory. In particular reference to Singapore, its quite impossible to strike gold by having this fantasy of being an entertainer or athlete. Yes, actors and sportsmen do make a decent living out of their jobs. But I'm talking about rubbing shoulders with the likes of David Beckham or some Hollywood star who rolls in dollar notes. Correct me if I'm wrong. If education doesn't make a man, then why does the Singapore government spend exorbitant amounts of money in the education sector? Why is it made compulsory that every child is entitled to a Primary School education or his/her parents could be put behind bars? Its grotesque to think that education isn't a key to a better future. Unless you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth or your parents opened a bank account for you that would last a lifetime. Then these people don't exactly deserve much credit because they are no far better than a worthless airhead. You gotta make it on your own. Start from scratch. Then what you reaped will be based on your own ability, and not by being some leech.
We drank, we ate and we made merry. All that's left is that beer belly and love handles. How about discounts on a personal trainer. The turkey, rich foods and booze are taking their toll.New year, new fat.
A Merry Christmas to one and all. And now the New Year is just round the corner ; new resolutions, new dreams, new hopes. Hopes for a better future, and a toast that the new year will be a better year for all. Good riddance to natural disasters, particularly in reference to Tsunamis, earthquakes, bird flu and poverty.
"Blue Christmas"would describe year 2005's Christmas perfectly. On a lighter note, there were many meaningful things done though. My birthday is in an hour's time. Perfect test to distinguish who the real friends are. The ones who bothered to remember and carry out that simple act of sending a wish are clearly the friends who have been keeping you in memory.
A birthday is not about glamour, costly gifts or anything superficial. You're organizing the coolest party by the beach, hired DJs, hired bartenders, ordered cartons of booze, sent invitations to the most popular peeps in town, scantily-clad hot girls gonna dirty dance to your party's groovy tunes. And so? The point is? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
Because this party wasn't designed for your pleasure. This party was custom-made to compell party animals that you invited. And these strangers whom you "chill out" with are supposedly your real friends? I beg to differ. If the party was some mediocre party without free grog or exotic ambience, I bet the guest figures would drastically decrease.
Its a different story if its a couple of true friends you've got, your girlfriend who's stuck with you since prehistoric time, and your dear family who would be completely enthralled to know that you wanted them to spend your birthday with them. Of course, in some negative cases where true friends, girlfriends or family is scarce, then at least you know that there will be God from heaven who would not miss out on your birthday - cos' He remembers all His children's birthdates.
Sitting by the fireplace on a chilly night. The candle flames softly flickering in the pitch black atmosphere. Chimes of the ancient clock start to play in the background. With closed eyelids and a deep breath, rocking in that dusty old armchair and sipping from the wine glass, you whisper with waning voice "Happy Birthday to me". Shimmering glass smashing onto the velvet floor, the curtain calls. Life saga's swan song. Death is as sweet as Christmas's candy cane.
A quick bite at a particular outlet hauled in this very random thought to my head. If I could choose to an owner of a certain company, I would choose the F&N Coca-Cola Company.
The lady at the counter asked me which beverage I wanted to have. There were only 3 choices - Coke, Seasons Iced Lemon Tea, and Sprite. I was in no mood for the articifial-tasting Season's lemon tea, neither was I in for a fizzy sugar-water drink(sprite). Coke was my reluctant choice at the end. It was then that it occured to me that we consumers are indirectly "forced" into the choice of beverage that the food company chooses to provide. No matter how you look at it, Coke still maintains its top position in the beverage hierarchy and reigns as the best selling drink worldwide. I mean, seriously, who hasn't drank coke?
Diet Coke - America's solution to obesity problems. Presumably flabby Americans purchase Diet Coke by the cartons, assuming that Diet Coke is this miracle drink which manages to contain obesity. Thus they consume Diet Coke by the exorbitant amounts and still end up, fat. Furthermore the artificial ingredients and chemicals isn't exactly healthy for the human body. Coke itself is already corrosive, Diet Coke? Bad choice.
The one who benefits is the big boss of the F&N company who gets to collect the HUGE proceeds from the sales of his drink. Just imagine all his fat carat diamonds stubbed on his ear and the shiny blings drooping from his pressed Hugo Boss suit. Then he glances at the cumulative frequency curve analysed by his employee, snorts to himself and pipes away on his Havana cigar, sipping from his glass of Dom Perignon. "Yup, this is D life, while you suckers drink my cheap coke."
The joy of Christmas occurs once every year. Unfortunately, it seems that as the years pass by, the enthusiastic ; joyous spirit slowly starts to wane. I reminisce about the good ol' times I used to have at my family's usual Christmas gathering. I was just a green child then. I'd look forward for the clock to strike 12, then us kids would scramble to the huge christmas tree(I was small and christmas trees were tall), hunting for the beautifully-wrapped presents that decorated our names. I recall being thoroughly elated. Mother Earth back then was not imbued with disasters and tragedies. Mother Earth was rid of cynical psychopathic humans who seek joy within the realms of torment. We merely wanted to have Rosemary turkey and champagne together with our loved ones ; Christmas carols softly playing in the background.
It is unfortunate that as we step further into the millenium, catalytic events start to populate. Who's concern is it that Jesus our saviour was born on the 25th of December. Who bothers that Christmas is all about giving and learning how to love. All i receive is probably invitations to have a "good" night out at the clubs - with the purpose to make merry and hook up with someone "hot" in that moment of lust and folly. Christmas does not suck my dear friend, YOU made it look like rotten eggs. YOU ridicule the true spirit of Christmas and mock the intentions of why Christmas is celebrated worldwide. YOU only care that you will return to your sleepy hollow with a handfull of wrapped parcels. Those who don't appreciate the joy of Jesus's birth should not adhere to the custom of exchanging gifts. Christmas shall not be used as a reason to get hitched or blindly exchanging gifts just because you read up on Santa Claus and his escapades as a kid.
Working extra shifts to earn that extra dough on the Christmas season depicts such a ghastly picture. "Sorry I can't attend so-and-so's party because I'm strapped for cash and the public holiday pays well." Give me a break and give yourself one too. I doubt Jesus would be enthralled to know that instead of spiritually celebrating his birthday with him, you are working your ass off not to donate more tithes to church but to fill up your own pockets. Grandma told me that certain members of the family are unable to attend this year's Christmas party. I abhor the thought that people are slowly losing it to the financial stress that the devil had incurred in the society. Once you start to break tradition, the glass will never be clear again ; scratches are all you'll leave. Its not that I'm desperate to have a view of the whole family's face, its just that you can never predict when tragedy strikes and the chances of the once-blissful-gathering will vanish forever.
In this uncertain world, we can expect the unexpected. Deter yourself before the milk is spilt. A life impaled on regrets is certainly not worth living.
The last cell group meeting for year 2005 was a blast. It couldn't have been better. The people, the food, the lessons learnt, they all fit together perfectly like a jigsaw puzzle. We may come from different walks of life, families, culture, but miraculously share the same goal - to make the best out of our Christian life and pledge to be a better child of God.
These people are whom I betroth my respect to. They deserve every inch of it. Its unfortunate that I have to admit they provide much better friendships than some of my other friends. Not because we have the same faith in common, but because actions depict a thousand words. And you thought church friends were just hi-bye and see you for service next week.
I prayed for you today. Shutting my eyes tightly and speaking in other tongues, I prayed for what you wanted to receive on the 19th of December. I know you will achieve great heights because you deserve it ; I witnessed the exorbitant effort you put in. Although we may have our differences and common squabbles, you will still find me at the end of the tunnel, cheering you on. Haha, cheese factor hitting its maximum point now.
Thank you Lord for the countless blessings You have showered upon my life. Thank You for sending true friends despite the fact that it seems like Judgement Day has arrived because of all the catalytic world disasters. Thank You for loving parents although they do have their flaws and also the unnecessary material possessions which I know at times I don't deserve to have. And, thank You Father, for sending me my mortal angel. Forever almighty is the Prince of Peace.
Can't wait for February to arrive. That's when the O level results are revealed. And that's also when I'll be embarking on my new journey of a different educational environment. Whether the outcome of the results are positive or negative, I know I did my best. Although I reckon I'll drown myself with Black Cat or something if I couldn't make it into Junior College.
Wow, my first time paragraphing in this greenhorn-blog. New school, new faces. Its like a chance to start life afresh again. That's if you screwed up before. But being a normal human being, I do have my moments of scandals. I'm no Mr Perfect, I've made unchangeable mistakes as a juvenile. However, the thought of stepping on new blankets of snow is extremely appealing to me. I don't feel a tad upset to leave the bittersweet past behind ; although some may beg to differ because beautiful memories hold them back.
Life has to go on. I'll make the best out of my stay at the new school. "Father, please guide me, I won't screw up like the last time. I'll be a better friend and student towards the new peeps. I'll do mom and dad proud by doing my job to devote attention to academics and aesthetics. I will, I must."
The aroma of Christmas and the New Year flushing in. In a flash, year 2005's days are numbered. So many things. So so many things I never did. So many tasks I failed to complete. So many people I forgot to tell. Tell them how much they meant to me. 2005's been quite a difficult bitch and a pain in the arse. On the contrary, there were good times. Good times with her. Now there's something to smile about. =)
I'm 18 next year? I still thought I was a 10 year old brat. Oh come on, humour me. Alcohol and cigars? NOT. Don't even think about it. Its kickass in the gym and not health-hazardous luxuries.
Queerly, I miss the academic stress. Which is also my top notch reason to enroll in Junior College. Most would take a huge sigh of relief knowing that the big Os are over and done with, but I cannot believe I actually miss all the mugging and late nights. It actually acts as a drive to me ; a goal to achieve for better prospects. No point brooding about it now, especially when the 3 month vacation is robbing me of my daylights. That's the time when lonliness starts to try and harrass. You wake up feeling empty, with no targets to achieve whatsoever. And just to add on to the negative atmosphere, I HATE ; DETEST my birthday. Except for the fact I have a reason to obtain a costly gift from my folks. Its just another damn day. And my birthday's jinxed too, the Tsunami crisis happened on the 26th of December, thats MY birthday for you.
A swift goodbye to 2005, hello 2006. Oh yes, not to mention all the cool UMDs coming out for psp in 2006. Yahoo. Rats, now where's those Classified pages to look for a job or I can kiss those stuff goodbye.
Running away from troubled waters always seems like an ideal solution. Question is, does it permanently solve the situation? I digress. Recently, pals of mine have caught the "heart-wrench" virus. Makes me wonder if I'll be the next victim. When your situation's completely fine, you wonder how it feels like to be caught in the dumps. And when you're finally consumed into darkness, you scream for help and pray so hard that you'll be out of the hell hole soon. How human nature causes us to take our happy moments for granted ; never counting our blessings. It could be a test of the human emotional system, but more like a suicide test to see who's driven to despair first. But if its compulsory that I go through this vicious cycle, then I choose to gear up and play the game well ; with my rules. Tell me about it, I've been through those emo shit so much That I can still vividly recall the exact feelings of those dark days. Go through that death maze one more time? Absolutely NOT. Reality always hurts for some doesn't it? That's why there's technology to act as a saviour - the cyber world. Play the game ; do anything you please ; its your world to create. Fleeing into the dimensions of the digital realm - does it salvage all the petty problems, or does it only give you the cowardly rank? Well i know of desperates who can't get a girl in their neighbourhood, but they sure take after Hugh Hefner, the playboy legend in certain games designed for the unwanted lads. I think I pondered enough about these weird thoughts, but its roots come from the overrated "escaping painful reality" drama. She's back from her relatively long journey. "No comment" is something I suprisingly feel about her return. The numb ; hollow feelings follow after. Complete dilemma. Being confused with yourself isn't exactly very appealing. This battle between myself and nature is nowhere near its swan song. I will continue to elope, escaping the grasps of reality's negativity, until the day I stumble upon clear acres of white meadow fields, holding the truths and answers I have been in search of. Till then...
I may lose everything I own in life. Material objects, friends, family, girls, they may all disappear into obscurity but I know You, my almighty holy Father, will never. This entry is dedicated to the One who will never forsake me even if I am an unworthy sinner. You are looking at me from the gates of heavens, guiding me silently to be a better man. Dying on the cross thousands of years ago for our sins was the most benevolent and self-sacrificing act You could do. You are a God of valour, strength, and most importantly, it is your forgiving heart that can move mountains and exterminate the devil. Alone and bitter, but shutting my eyes and praying in the sound of silence, I realise that lonliness has never occured to me. Awesome Father, the love You have for us is undying and pure. Here I am today, head bowed down in guilt, asking for your mercy and forgiveness prior to all the wrong I have done as a human on Earth. They say nothing lasts forever ; all good things come to an end(cliche I know), but I dare to challenge these quotes, because Jesus my Lord has a relationship with us that will carry on eternally. Its whether we choose to accept the gifts He has bestowed upon us, or choose whether we want to recognise Him as our saviour. I am living evidence that by accepting Him as my Father, life has been more serene and meaningful. Most importantly, never will you feel alone because He never abandons you. I learnt invaluable wisdom from my Father : to love others. This is the toughest obstacle a man can possibly face. Because deep in the hearts of men, there will always be some hatred brewing ; some unfinished scores to settle. Therefore I choose to believe that the act of forgiveness is pure. The word of God tells us that you can say you love Him but hate your brother, and that is considered blasphemy. No one can possibly love God if they hate another human He has created and loved. This set me in deep thought. I claim I have developed hatred for certain people in my life, but if I want to be a step closer to be worthy to Him, I would have to convince myself that all hatred in me shall be forgotten but instead instill forgiveness and love which definitely isn't a piece of cake. I know that by embarking on this obstacle-filled mission, I am guaranteed peace at the finishing line. I end this entry by giving thanks to my Father for his irreplaceable love he has showered upon me. It is everlasting ; all I could possibly require in this lifetime. Amen.
Is there some character development or alteration class available? A worried person does not equal a happy person. Sometimes there's nothing negative going on but yet my horrid and warped mind will presume there is. Coming back from my usual but excessively lousy run makes me feel at the bottom of the world. The feeling of a lack of oxygen, cease of the brain functioning and pulse rate bursting is something I don't look forward to. I must admit I was never a good runner ; it has never been my forte since kinder age. But at least in the year 2004 I know my stamina and running ability was at its peak. Okay its probably due to the at-least-3-times-a-week gym training that used to be in my regimen. But as soon as the year 2005 arrived - I prefer to call it the "Year of the Lazy Slob" though, I started to waver in gym training or regular runs at the stadium. Even the usual Saturday morning swims became a bleak picture. I was left with my Tennis trainings on Sunday which obviously does not help someone to keep in shape cos its only once a week. I cannot fathom how I have become an AFC(average frustrated chump). I used to recognise the personal trainers and the usual gym freaks but now as I walk in, everyone, and including some machines look foreign to me. Blame it on the O level examinations? It is not a valid reason or excuse. There is NO such thing as "Oh damn, I've got no time." Unless I can confidently say that I have been mugging diligently all year, NOT. And therefore, a disgruntled me would have to go with the "I was simply fat and lazy" reason, which clearly isn't anything to be proud of. To top off to the negative aspects, I also remember instances where I simply sat around and binged. This is unacceptable to me. What poor self control. Even motivational books or health mags couldn't salvage this bad situation. I stare at my tubs of whey protein and creatine realising specks of dust forming on its lid. Now don't play dumb with me, you know what this means. The prospective of continuing to remain the same sickens me. But whoever said it was easy to get back on track. Yes shape up and ship out, any easy way out? NO. I should write down a promise to myself that these 3 months of vacation will be put to lucrative useage. But for starters a replacement for the lost gym membership card should be top priority. Hah.
4.47 am, still not crashing yet? Yup. I'm awake and turning my life nocturnal. Melatonin's helpful, but won't I get addicted to it? I don't wanna be reliant on such chemicals. I was sleeping fine till you had to leave on your holy journey. Of course you're in no way responsible for my sleep. What a ghastly way to start a new entry, I thought the firsts' were always positively happy. I refuse to pretend all's bliss just to please public eye. The truth is always pure, isn't it? Hate your texts sometimes. It can be so contradictingly convincing but yet a futile attempt to try and please. I can see through it like clear glass. I wish i couldn't though, so I'll just happily whistle away assuming all's well. Time seems to pass by like a gang of snails climbing hills since that day. I am so afraid to wake up. Its something I don't actually look forward to. Everyone knows when you sleep, your heart, soul and brain takes a break too. Whatever disaster that happened will all come to a standstill when a person sleeps. Mobile phones can be such an evil gadget too. Yeah of course they convenience lives. But they sure irritate me at the wrong time. Waking up to find an empty screen can be so torturing. Or worse still, a buzz from someone insignificant. How this thought is starting to sicken me already! Eat slugs. I hate to bother about you. Who knows you might just come back without your heart. Promises aren't guarantees. Especially when it comes to matters like these. So I am supposed to immaturely accuse you if you don't keep your word? I think I'll be the loser sinking in mud at the end of the day if I blamed you. But of course, people change all the time. And you are in no way indifferent.
