Living Past

There is so much I could tell you. Virtually impossible to string it in words. I wish half of me could travel back in time, I swear I would have cherished it more than I did before. I would have done something radical enough to make you stay. Its a rare opportunity that once in your lifetime, you meet someone who manages to captivate your attention, and leave their footprints behind.

Today was dreadful. I was being taken on a rollercoaster ride that pumped adrenaline in the most negative of ways. I left the ride bitter, filled with the type of stubborn pain that rooted itself firmly on me. If I could illustrate a portrait of myself, it would be me walking with dark clouds and rain pouring above my head. Ignorance is kind, a pity I wasn't spared. If living in putrid lies drew rainbows, then may I find that pot of gold.

Others may beg to differ when it comes to opinions, but I enjoy living in this fantasy whereby my eyes see an enchanting, kind, image of you. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I choose to dismiss all the surface-flaws that I fail to see. You might be the one I have been searching to find, but in a series of unfortunate events, I missed out on that chance that was given to me, a long, time ago. Fretting is pointless, I need to hear you, so walking out of that door isn't an option. Alas, someone worthy enough to steal the limelight through pure means. Behind that defensive camouflage, I'm affirmative that there is some part of you that will eventually let go.

Call me an ignorant fool, but I'd lock myself in an asylum if I failed to make you see... I love you, my friend, I really do. If I hadn't committed myself earlier, I never would have allowed myself to let you slip away. Shutting the world into another dimension, you look wonderful, tonight.

Blooded Rose

You are perfect, flawless and a ravishing beauty in my eyes. Just that I have failed to make you aware of it. I try my best to please and accommodate, but sometimes its just exhausting. I feel fatigued from all these petty troubles. School will start in approximately a month, I can't keep up with this, its simply too exasperating. At times, I feel as though I am in need of Aunt Agony's services. Listening ears are scarce.

Today I witnessed a heated fight between an elderly man and a middle-aged bloke. Cops and paramedics were called in. What a bloody sight. The frail old man who was shabbily dressed was hurling verbal abuse at the younger man in dialect. The fight sparked only when the old man insanely decided to jab him in the face. He picked up the old man like an insolent child and smashed his boney body onto the cement floor. Tables and chairs were thrown like shot-putts all over the area. I could hardly believe my eyes seeing the pride-filled old man struggle and finally stagger away. And by hearing the dialogue, it seems that the old man had watched the younger man grow up. This incident has confirmed that, to me, humanity has died. By the time the rapture arrives, all these foolishness shall be burned like ashes, buried 6 foot underground.

I will salvage until I exhaust all my energy resources. And if that day does arrive, then I will understand that it isn't meant to be. Tears carry no value. They are merely weak emotions executed by men who have failed. Drop blooded tears, if I can. Like how He bled for us. Summer has gone, fading into oblivion.

The Not-So Grande Finale

In this wretched world I have managed to stumble upon the act of kindness. My new road bike - a tragedy in disguise. Or maybe I'm simply a hard-headed amateur rider. Grazed knees and horrid blue-blacks, I am your new friendly neighbourhood cripple. Never in my life I have had trouble putting on some socks, or taking them off for that matter. But you know what they say, there's always a first time for everything.

I thought money had consumed the people of the world, generally. This nearby clinic proved me wrong. I merely wanted some tissue to wipe the blood flowing down my knees. Yes, I turned heads for the wrong reasons. I was given pieces of gauze and to my surprise, she insisted that I go inside for some dressing. Such humanitarian acts are extinct, I am relieved to know that in a pile of thorns, there is a rose. I won't forget this, thank you.

As for my long-anticipated results, bummer. 2 particular subjects which I had placed hopes in, they dashed my dreams. Oh well,so its off to a junior college which sadly, isn't the one of my choice. I learnt that you don't always achieve what you want, and failures have to be taken in strides - it will be the only way you don't get stuck in quick sand. I will comfort myself with the thought that I still have a shot at the more-important A levels. Hopefully, the culture there is one that I can accustom myself to. Screwing up is not an option, its a crime.

On the subject of world affairs, I don't agree with the European political cartoons which insult the Middle Eastern's holy Prophet. However, one should never resort to violence or terrorism either. It would be great if amicable methods were practised. This fickle and sensitive world has yet to learn perfection. Virtually, impossible.

Would you rather face death or be put behind bars your whole life? Personally, I choose death. It is such a pity that the members of the Bali 9 are youths who COULD have had a bright prospect if they conformed to laws. Imagine, an 18 year old youth being sentenced to lifetime imprisonment. It means being trapped in a vicious black hole forever, with absolutely no way out. I guess its human nature not to consider the repercussions and only wake up when the harshness of reality strikes.

Cupid's day just passed and after stepping out of my younger days, I tend to think that everything about the 14th of February are mere sales gimmicks for the commerce sector. Costly gifts, posh restaurants and ridiculously-priced roses - all part of a masquerade. If you were happy and blissful with your loved one everyday, everyday's Valentine's Day. And a real one too.