Odds End

So close and yet so far - this statement applies to many events. As expected, the underdogs remained under the tables, nothing eyebrow-raising. Yjc's tennis team is finally out of the 'A' Division, after a hasty trashing from the spotlighted ACJC. It was such a fruitful experience for rookies like myself. I beat myself up once again for slothing away last year. Damn, I coulda been there.

After attending a missionary school for 11 years, certain values have been instilled. That sense of belonging and identity can only be found in non-neighbourhood jcs. Truth is, I am a miserable schoolboy who has lost his way in foreign lands. I miss walking past those religious emblems and statues. I miss those prayers which starts the morning off on a positive note. I miss knowing that God blesses me.

And so He said "Ask and you shall receive." Then again, He added "Take that one step and I'll take the rest for you." I have obviously failed to start the ball rolling. I am not exactly the epitome of academic scholarship, professional athletics or brilliant aesthetics. Which is the very vile reason how I landed myself in a "dilapidated", cold jc which feels like it lacks all presence of God. Its such a paradox, that at times I'd like to categorize myself as someone with an abundance of such skills. What God gave to me is substantial, it only does not suffice for admission into ....

She was standing less than two steps away. There was something intriguing about her. One of those mysteries that compells you to try and solve. Fate fell short this time. My refusal to acknowledge the dead end keeps me hanging over the ledge. I left the gates pondering, what if I had opened my mouth? The difference in calibre would have mattered. Its a compulsive behaviour that I myself, am guilty of. The team getting whacked in the butt 5 nil wasn't exactly aiding the situation either. Life's certainly not a bed of roses. Now, that's just too bad isn't it?

Now you see it, now you don't.